With the passing of Mother’s Day comes the hopeful passing of stress-induced days COVID-19 offered to Mothers everywhere.
As a mom myself, I faltered under mounting stress as I maneuvered caring for my household of four other people and working from home. Being committed fully to work and family at times felt like an impossible task. The weight of everything was exhausting and thankless, being perceived as not fully present as an employee or a mother. But moms are resilient and created to make the best of all situations.
My co-worker, Michelle, quickly became my greatest empathizer, being a mom herself and caretaker of her own mother during this time. Together, we discovered three key areas where stress turned to lessons learned.
Communication
The first challenge I conquered was to verbally admit to my co-workers and family I was overwhelmed. Of course, my team was understanding and offered a couple solutions, along with encouragement. It was a turning point I needed to take control of my work-from-home situation. I began to see stress was a waste of my limited energy and I stopped taking myself so seriously. I can’t be a perfect mother 24/7, nor can I be the perfect professional 24/7.
Creating Boundaries
One of the most important solutions that emerged from meeting with my co-workers was to adhere to firm working hours. Since I no longer had physical distance from my work, I needed to find a way to also have mental distance during non-work hours. Untangling home duties from work duties was a challenge, but a few simple rules proved to alleviate much of the stress such as: don’t open or reply to emails after dinner. Don’t eat lunch at your desk. Don’t feel guilty about taking a screen-free break to play a round of Candyland with the kids when they ask. Oh yes, and do NOT forget to sign out of Microsoft Teams at the end of the workday.
Michelle was a quicker study than I and immediately moved into a private workspace, but agreed it took awhile to learn how to unplug and transition during the short commute back up the stairs.
But it’s Not all Bad….
The more lines I drew in the sand, the more I realized my number one priority during this challenging moment was to protect the time I had with my kids, while I had it. It was then, I started seeing that I wasn’t a failure as a parent or an employee. In fact, I’m proud my young ones watched their mom shoulder these responsibilities with strength and resilience both working on the computer and handling home duties. They witnessed our small business seamlessly adapt to a new situation and work as a team to overcome inconvenient circumstances.
Michelle decided she was blessed to work from the comfort of home and chose not to return to the office. We still talk to her frequently via Teams, but while it is not the same without her, I am happy she found delight working from home. I since returned part-time to the office. Yet another shift in the dynamics of my family’s lives, but I will always be thankful for both the opportunity to continue my employment and be present during a crucial moment in my children’s lives.
Although Mother’s Day is behind us, consider showing your wife, mother, or even colleague some well-deserved appreciation.